“Anti mi, They’ve come o. They are passing!”
My seven year old brother, Ladi, ran into the sitting room, literarily breathing the words to me. Running up the stairs wasn’t a small exercise. I had told him to watch out for some people that were going to pass. I knew from a source that they were going to go through my route, so I had decided to take a step today.
I looked at the time, I expected Aaron, my boyfriend of 3years to be here anytime soon, I’m grateful he was running late, atleast I’ll have the time to watch the rally through my window, an maybe even do what I had in mind-disgrace one of the ‘noise-makers’.
I opened my window which looked out to the road just in time to see them begin to gather. They all stopped at the T-junction directly opposite my house dancing, singing, laughing and just making noise generally. I knew some of them, even my best friend was among them but I didn’t care about the noise they were making.
“Happy Virginity Day
“No Sex Until Marriage. #nosum” was written boldly on a banner to of them held. Most were dressed in a customized red and white shirt with the ‘no sex until marriage’ inscription very visible at the back.
Were they a set of jobless young people? What was the all fuss about having sex before marriage anyway. Everyone did it, so, what was the big deal?!
I was beginning to get angry, but I did not even know why I was. I was angry at them, I guess. For shouting about virginity. So, did they mean people like me were worthless or something?
“How was I even sure that some of them were still virgins sef” I muttered to myself.
A smile cropped up my face. The perfect question. I ran downstairs to meet the no-sum people at the T-Junction. As I got downstair, a guy was saying something after which he announced that he was still a virgin. The gradually increasing population of those who were watching screamed! There was a mix of surprise and unbelief. I didn’t believe it anyway, he looked like someone who would have had sex before, looking at the goatee he was spotting and the red sneakers he was wearing. Virgins don’t dress like this. I refuse to answer the question ‘how do virgins dress’ that resounded in my heart.
As I pushed my way to the centre to find the right time to ask my questions, the virgin guy asked the crowd if the had any question on sexual purity. This was my chance, I counted one to five and raised my hand.
All eyes were on me as he walked towards me to give me the mic. I stood in front of my young an old people on my street and asked
“Are you truly a virgin? See how you are dressed, do virgins dress like this?”
He looked at me, collected the mic and replied with another question, a question I couldn’t answer before now
“How do virgins dress?”
I gulped and changed gear.
“Okay, are you all virgins here?”
I looked at the crowd behind me and loved the fact that I was speaking their minds.
“Oya answer” someone else said to the virgin guy.
The virgin guy collected the mic, paused a while and spoke
“Are we all virgins? Uhm…I will answer but let me explain” he started.
“Tell us jor” roared the crowd, I was enjoying this, my plan was working. They will never try to intimidate others with this their show of hypocrisy again.
He raised his hand for quiet and spoke,
“Are we all virgins? No. But….”
Discordant noise came from the crowd. He asked them to calm down, after few seconds they did. I was amazed at the smile I saw on the faces of some ‘small’ girls on the street. It was obvious those girls had been doing things. I shook my head for them.
“We are not all virgins, but we all have DECIDED to live sexually pure lives. What does that mean?
It means those that have had sex before have decided to stop having sex, or doing any touchy-touchy, kissing, pole dancing, grinding, smooching, or all those things. They have DECIDED and asked God to help them.
While those of us that are still virgins, like me” emphasizing his ‘like me’. Keeping eye contact with me, he continued “have decided not to even try those things until we eventually marry our wives or husband. Even when we all marry, we will stick to just that person”.
The crowd was calm until someone asked from the crowd, “why?”
“Because we don’t want STD.”
“Use condom jor”
“Condoms aren’t 100% perfect. True or false, some of you know you’ve had to abort a child, even after using condom. How did it pass?
Moreover, all the orisirisi demons you might be passing nko?”
I didn’t like what I was hearing. I looked towards my friend, she had her head bowed, muttering something. Was she the one that told this virgin guy about the abortion?
“See”, virgin guy continued “Sexual purity is the best. You don’t have to worry about diseases or demons or murdering babies or guilt. Its just the best. And the most important is that God will be very happy with you. So if you are not a virgin, it doesn’t matter, decide today. And if you are, cool, you too, decide today” he finished with a smile.
I didn’t like the way he was staring at me. I left the crowd back into my room as I heard them singing a song, holding the tears from falling.
I knew they weren’t judging, but it still hurts.
Aaron came later that day and we still had sex. I wanted to prove to myself that it didn’t matter. But it did. Now I knew the truth.
All that happened last year.
Now, in a couple of days from now, I will be joining the ‘virgin-people’ like I used to call them in going from school to streets to sing and “make noise” about virginity and sexual purity. I made the choice the day after the confrontation when I woke up in Aaron’s room. I just knew it.
My friend later told me she had been praying that God should do something drastic to bring me to Him. I guess I’m His now and I’m choosing to be #sexuallypure.
So, here I am telling you to remain a virgin. It pays. And if you have lost it before now, trying to make those who are feel ashamed won’t help you, listen and decide to.
I stand for #sexualpurity.
Anonymous #sexually pure girl.
ITS 3DAYS TO WORLD VIRGINITY DAY!
ITS STILL #NOSUM